How do you become more refined, self contained, and comfortable in own self?

Beauty Absolutely comes from within. No matter what you look like on the outside it is the inside that counts and matters the most. Their is someone for everyone. If you are a bigger girl n have esteem weight issues try working out and dieting, you will see fast results and no matter how much you change the confidence of your hard work will pay off. Confidence comes from who you believe you are and how you carry yourself. Be a lady, no cursing, male actions, etc. Hold your head up high and look in the mirror every day and say "I am Beautiful" this will psychologically work! Also whatever issues with your body, face, hair, etc. that make you feel less confident, try to look in style mags and beauty mags to get tips on what to do to be "up to date" per say. Most of all remember "hold your head up high carry your heart on your shoulders and always be a lady and that confidence will shine so bright the whole World will see it!